1. Katy Perry — “Dark Horse”
Lyrics that seem so romantic:
Are you ready for, ready for / A perfect storm, perfect storm
Cause once you’re mine, once you’re mine / There’s no going back
Why it’s not romantic: From the pyramid of Twinkies to the flaming hot Cheetos, the video reveals that Perry’s singing about her love of junk food.
2. Beyoncé Feat. Frank Ocean — “Superpower”
Lyrics that seem so romantic:
A tough love (Super power) / Uh huh, like a shark (Super power)
Ooh, like a bear / A tough love
Why it’s not romantic: Because sharks and bears don’t exactly inspire warm and fuzzy feelings.
3. Usher — “Good Kisser”
Lyrics that seem so romantic:
You make me wanna tap out and retire / Your pretty lips leave me so inspired
Why it’s not romantic:
Sexy, sure, but if you listen a little closer you’ll realize that Usher wants those “pretty lips” on something other than his mouth.
4. Disclosure Feat. Sam Smith — “Latch”
Lyrics that seem so romantic:
Now I’ve got you in my space / I won’t let go of you (never) / Got you shackled in my embrace / I’m latching on to you (never)
Why it’s not romantic: Shackles? Ouch.
5. Jason Derulo — “Trumpets”
Lyrics that seem so romantic:
Is it weird that I hear Violin / whenever you’re gone/Whenever you’re gone
Is it weird that your ass / Remind me of a Kanye West song?
Why it’s not romantic: While staring at the object of his desire, Jason Derulo thinks of… Kanye West.
6. One Direction — “Steal My Girl”
Lyrics that seem so romantic:
Everybody wanna steal my girl / Everybody wanna take her heart away
Couple billion in the whole wide world / Find another one ‘cause she belongs to me
Why it’s not romantic:
Overprotective much?
7. Trey Songz — “Na Na”
Lyrics that seem so romantic:
Ooh, na-na-na / Put your hands in the air if you’re loving tonight
Ooh, na-na-na / Keep your hands in the air if you’re spending the night
Ooh, na-na now, na-na, na-na-na-na-na
Why it’s not romantic:
All opportunities for romantic lyricism are replaced by na-na-na-na-na-na-na.
8. Ariana Grande Feat. The Weeknd — “Love Me Harder”
Lyrics that seem so romantic:
Tell me something I need to know / Then take my breath and never let it go
If you just let me invade your space / I’ll take the pleasure, take it with the pain
Why it isn’t romantic:
The rest of the song is Grande literally singing that she will leave her significant other if the sex isn’t good.
9. Chris Brown Feat. Usher and Rick Ross — “New Flame”
Lyrics that seem so romantic:
Who said you can’t find love in the club? / ‘Cause I wanna tell them they’re wrong
Come on, just, baby, try a new thing / And let’s spark a new flame
Why it’s not romantic: 1) Chris Brown. 2) Rick Ross.
10. Nick Jonas — “Jealous”
Lyrics that seem so romantic:
‘Cause you’re too sexy, beautiful / And everybody wants a taste
That’s why (that’s why) / I still get jealous
Why it’s not romantic:
Jealousy isn’t a good look on anyone, even a hottie like Nick Jonas.
11. Magic! — “Rude”
Lyrics that seem so romantic:
Why you gotta be so rude? / Don’t you know I’m human too?
Why you gotta be so rude? / I’m gonna marry her anyway
Why it’s not romantic: The whole song is basically a tantrum about not getting the father’s approval, but HELLO have you asked your girlfriend?
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